I am almost nearing the end of my year working abroad and I am very afraid of going back home. Not really afraid of being there but more afraid about all the unknown choices and the possibilities of falling into the same old habits.
I have finally decided that the ultimate downfall of wanderlust is being afraid of being stuck in one place. No change or challenge scares me.
This all came about when I received an email from my old boss offering my old job back to me. Of course I had to weigh all the pros and cons before I actually agreed to what my heart was telling me. It is easy to go back and go work for someone who I am already familiar with, for a property that I know and also a job that I know I can do well. But my fear is I will get trapped again, it is hard to walk away from something that has a special place in your heart and I have already done that twice.
What if I do go back and work for him again? Will I stay there for another year and force myself to leave because I am not being challenged?
I am afraid to say no, but I know that if I do accept this position again I will easily fall back into old habits. I have changed, I need challenges and new faces (but I like my old habits – the struggle…).
At the end of the day, I guess we all face these choices or similar little changes everyday. I am going to try and stick to the belief that the universe has a plan for me – and it is certainly taking a step forward, and not back into old habits.
If the only challenges we face are those that life has thrown at us, then we are merely living life in reaction only – we are not pushing ourselves and directing our own destiny. Our greatest challenges should be those we give ourselves to reach our full potential. – Brendon Burchard